By Buffilous

Yow, unno notice how tings change yah now. Straight up, nuh bruck pocket man caan come and waan check a girl and expect har fi par wid him. Nah sah, di only way she a guh let off or deal wid him nice is if she harslef well heavy and a look smady fi just have some fun wid.Di fuss ting di woman a guh sey him haffi can let off fi maintenance, suh straight up, no romance without finance.

Di woman dem sey haffy look good and dem haffi smell sweet tuh and dat nuh come cheap. Yup. Dem have a list a work wid, toiletries, food money, bills, panties and nuff a dat cause dem sey some a unno love tear dem off and at di rate whey unno dweet it cost fi keep replacing dem. It’s strictly Victoria Secret and di Frederick of Hollywood please! But den again a wha kinda animals unno a deal wid sah!So if di money nuh run, den a dead stock ting dat wi a talk bout.

Di nex’ ting di woman dem a talk bout is how unno love when dem wash and press unno clothes, but when di light and water bill come unno a frownz fi pay it. Hear mi now star, none a dat around here! But dem lucky siddung a tun slave over unno clothes and haffi a argue fi get money fi pay bills, di time unno teck a do dat unno go look wuck whey a pay?

Still man fi realize sey woman expense fi maintain, she haffi guh do regular check up and dem deh gynecolist bill nuh cheap.Bare essentials include dinner (yuh nuh expect har fit un kitchen slave) movies, (yuh haffi teck har out sometimes, yuh caan expect har fi watch DVD 24/7, shopping spree (den how yuh mean), bills (orpart a it) and di closer yuh get dat dey list gooda increase tuh!

Yuh waan woman…dem nuh come cheap…tink bout dat!

Photography By: Milton Raynor

Please vote for either Contestant A or B for the hottest Girl of the Week.

Choose the image you like best and vote by placing the letter A or B in your comments.

.

By: Joan Wilson

Teck proper care a yuh pickney dem

Sorry dat mi nuh check in on Thursday, but fi tell yuh di truth di flu have mi a way star, mi neva know sey it coulda weaken yuh body suh. But a little roots and some herbal medicine and a mi dis again.

Bwoy mi deh pon a campaign dis time fi di children. Being as a child's month mi haffi talk up di tings fi dem. Nuff people a talk bout how dis generation gone to di dawgs and all kind a sinting, but dem eva stop fi tink a who do di damage.

Yuh tink you can have you young pickney and every night you gwan skin out yuhself a dance, a galang like unno nuh have nuh responsibility. Di money whey yuh fi teck send di pickney dem guh a school and buy food gi dem, yuh teck a put up big expensive hairstyle and den left dem fi tun pest to people a road.

Sometime mi haffi wonda, why some people badda have pickney fah. Dem just left dem like leggo bees and open to all kinda influence and den when di pickney dem behaviour out a control society start cuss bout dis ya generation dread.

Parents must start do dem wuck and stop depend pon granny and teacher and heaven know who else. Spend time with unno children, talk to dem, give dem a chance fi talk to unno, meck sure your influence a di one him teck on tuh, cause believe me, if unno doan dweet, smady else will and you won't like whey dem a teach dem either.

Fi all who nuh start a family yet, tink long and hard bout da step whey yuh a meck, before yuh do it. If a just di lovemecking ting yuh want, den protect unnoself. Once you bring a pickney in di world everyting change afta dat.

Anyway, a child's month and a lef yuh wid dis, if you can't stand di heat, tan out a di kitchen...nuh bring nuh pickney inna di worl' if unno prepared fi do good by dem...a suh mi sey!

By: Buffilous

Yow, a mi again and dis time mi a talk bout di licky licky people dem.

Mi memba how mi granny used to sey, "craven choke puppy" and she always a quote from di bible sey di love of money is the root of all evil. Fi tell yuh di truth mi neva really understand whey she a deal wid until mi grow up and si what a gwaan inna di world.

Believe it or not, mi have times when mi siddung and hold a meds and it's in one a dem session mi start to reflect and di more mi tink bout it, di more mi realize sey all di problem inna di world come from di fact dat nuff people caan satisfy. Dem always want more, and when dem caan get it, dem go out a dem way fi do whatever it teck fi get it.

Picture dis, some people woulda want yuh fi tink sey dem have harmone problem why dem attracted to di opposite sex, but when you check out di real root a it, tru di man or woman weh have nuff money a let off, mek sum a dem go di odda way, cause dem wah big lifestyle and no wah wuk fi ti...nuh greed dat?

Look how bad mind develop and conflict now, sey yuh get a bligh fig uh foreign come back a Jamaica and sey how much jing bang reach a yuh yard with long list a whey dem want...dem just feel sey yuh guh up and hit one gold mine... nuff a dem nuh waan wuck, but dem long eye yuh success....before yuh know dem a plan yuh downfall.

Den nuh mention di likky likky man dem. Yuh fi hear di big old bark dem, mummy, dada, let off a ting nuh? But si yah, when yuh have pickney big suh! Dem fi teck dem lazy, craven self and guh work...unno follow mi people. A greediness, long eye and laziness a destroy wi world.

Well sah...dis one look like it a guh teck whole heap prayer fi deal wid.

YardFlex would like to send Earthday greetings to one of reggae's finest drummers, Sly Dunbar. Wishing him all the best on his special day.

.

Photography By: Milton Raynor

Please vote for either Contestant A or B for the hottest Girl of the Week.

Choose the image you like best and vote by placing the letter A or B in your comments.

.

By: Rootzgirl

Getting over from a failed relationship is not an easy task. For many women they never really do. Even if they get involved with another man, the poor man must bear the sins of his predecessor as she lays everything on him. If she couldn’t trust him and worse if it was his cheating ways that ended that relationship, you can bet your bottom dollar that she is gonna watch him like a hawk, search his phone and maybe get a detective to watch his every move.

On the other hand some women can shake off the hurt in a couple of months and move on like it never happened, she will go into another relationship like it's the first time without any baggage but with a heart open to love and trust again.

It's hard to tell in the relationship game cause men on the other hand have a knack of moving on while he is still in the relationship and the poor woman is the last to know that it is really over.

The amazing thing in all of this and I wish someone would help me to figure it out is that how come men always know when the woman is single again? They don't lyrics you until your man walks out and they seem to find the right words to say to touch your wounded pride.

Bottom line though, how long does it really take to walk away from a failed relationship and can a time span be really placed on healing? I don't know cause some men and women have a hard time letting go, even when one of the partners have moved on, one continue to call and badger even going out of their way to call that new someone in their lives and be rude.

The moving on game is really hard...but ultimately it has to be done...guess the only question is, just how long will it take?

By: Buffilous

Yeah man, me Buffilous again. Mi back broad, mi nuh gi two cents whey nobady waa write bout mi. Rootz girl can tan deh meck everyting badda har, if yuh duh dat yuh neva meck a move. Anyway, all a di YardFlex reader dem a mi friend so mi nuh care how dem cuss mi out...mi love almshouse and mi nah tap. And speaking bout mix up and blenda check out dis ya one yah.

And before unno chat, no a nuh mi friend, mi just know bout di situation alright.

Dis 69 year old rasta woman deh wid a 27 year old guy who waan fi marry har. But how she suh lucky. Dat deh young stud waan har fi di rest a har life and yuh have some young ooman whey can't find a man a har own!

Mi sey, mi hear how di man treat har wid maximum amount a respect. Mi a talk bout open car door, pull out har chair meck she siddun, drop har off, pick har up any hours a di night she happen fi need a ride and it seem as if di man contented as long as she deh near him. But wid all a dat, di most shocking part a di whole mix is dat him still nuh sleep wid har yet. Him claim sey him not rushing anyting, him want to marry her and den him visit har promised land.

Bwoy mi nuh know di man sound too good fi be true...a wonda...well so mi get it so mi share it wid unno.

Till mi have more people business nex' time.

By: Rootzgirl

Hey peeps, from di odda day mi a hold a meds and kip quiet. Cause whether unno want to believe it or not mi nuh feel suh good when mi read unno comments and si some a whey unno haffi sey. Memba sey mi have an opinion like everyone else and unno nuh si mi a cuss unno off fi it. Straight up mi nuh suh strong like Buffilous cause it come een like sey comment just roll offa fi har back. Although some a fi har friend sem really outa whack.

But mi have something pon mi mind and mi caan kip it nuh more. Mi fed up! Mi tiad! Mi caan teck di way how di fish dem just a teck ova everything. Yuh have money gay, powerful gay, committed gay and di whole a dem a attack di straight people a Jamaica. Not to mention how di artistes dem a feel it. Red Stripe stop sponsor live shows, some artiste caan even perform any and anywhey and pon top a it, it come een like dem waa fi tell wi how fi run wi country.

Wha happen man, how di gay dem a guh suh hard? Dem nah stop till dem get every single soul fi accept dem lifestyle? Tell mi, how much more damage dem can duh. And while mi on mi crusade, whey di people dem a guh duh fi start protecting dem turf. It caan galang suh, fi real. At the di rate dem a guh, mi nah guh can find any man fi deal wid cause if we follow dem, dem corrupt every available straight man wid dem money and mi nuh know what else.

Dem have tuh much chat inna wi country. Straight people, unno start talk up di tings dem man and get a voice, whey unno banner and placards deh, fi guh march sey 'no gays around here!' straight! Well mi get dat offa mi chest, mi wi si unoo nex' time when mi nuh suh bex.

Photography By: Milton Raynor

Please vote for either Contestant A or B for the hottest Girl of the Week.

Choose the image you like best and vote by placing the letter A or B in your comments.

.

Photography By: Milton Raynor

Please vote for either Contestant A or B for the hottest Girl of the Week.

Choose the image you like best and vote by placing the letter A or B in your comments.

.

By: Joan Wilson

Artiste fi stand by dem one anadda

Now hear what, mi a nuh big big fan a Mavado cause personally a tink him have too much gun lyrics and tings, and when it come to di Killer mi check fi some a him song. But dat a nuh mi contention right now, mi a sey dat di artistes dem too divided star.

Yuh tink if any country dis one a fi mi fellow entertainment writer den dem can get mi fi come up deh come cover anyting, yuh mussi mad!
Now how come Guyana ban Bounty Killer and Mavada from entering dem country, yet dem get one next artiste.... Beenie Man fi fill di slot. Big and serious him shoulda tell dem whey dem can get off and sey if dem nuh waan Bounty nor Mavado, den him nuh waan deh deh either. Now mi know dat everybody waan eat a food and dat tings expensive so when yuh get di chance fi meck a buck, yuh a guh waan teck it, but a time fi di artistes dem come together and start fight back.

A wonda if dem know dat there is strength in numbers. If it nuh meck nuh sense unno try capitalize on each other misfortune cause at the end of the day, if dem can teck whey two artiste freedom a speech, dem wi try teck whey fi unno tuh.

A time fi artiste stop bickering wid dem one anodda and figure out how dem a guh put a stop to all a di sabotage whey a dem face. Before yuh know it, odda countries a guh waan put ban pan dem tuh. If eva there is a time fi unity inna di biz...it is now...suh artistes unno done wid di passa passa and come together...time fi a change...a suh mi sey!

This booty was photographed at an event held recently in the US.

Please give us your honest opinion as to whether you think this booty tattoo is sexy or not.

By: Buffilous

Yeah a mi again, di same one whi got it nuff and plenty! Now since as mi a read Joan Wilson story and a check out whey she sey, mi haffi meck a comment. Yeah man mi find out sey a lot a hypocrisy a gwaan inna dis business.

Whey unno nuh admit sey why dis ting suh hard fi fight is because a whole heap a shotta and bad gal a play di same game tuh. Dem lean like wid dem homo and lesbian self. But unno caan duh nutten bout it caa dem wi do pure tings.

Yeah mi a guh talk up di tings dem as whey Spice woulda sey. A good friend a mine did married to this notorious badman...yup, him dead now, but him was one a di biggest fish outa di sea.

But di one tink mi blame har fah she kip up wid him almshouse dem, she haffi f*ck him wid di dildo inna him batty. Now can yuh imagine! And fi meck matter wuss, di ongle way him coulda pleasure har is if him do har inna har behind. Now tell mi, how sick dan dat can yuh get?
And she siddung pon di knowledge sey him a corrupt di likkle youth dem inna di community and meck dem come and gi him blow job...and yuh know what di sickest ting was...yeah when him deh a dance and di DJ dem a lick out gainst di fish dem, a fi him lighter fuss inna di air!

But a nuh just di man dem alone mi a lick out pan, mi a touch di rude gal dem whey gwan like dem criss and inna go-go club a French kiss. Mi hear sey one a dem inna har community she nuh ramp...nuh likkle school gal nuh safe...cause she par wid har bad man friend and lure di school gal dem inna har house...nuff people know and caan sey nutten cause yuh done know.

But a nuh everyting good fi eat good fi talk mi ongle a guh borrow di Killa words dem and sey, bad man nuh fren fish.

Photography By: Milton Raynor

Please vote for either Contestant A or B for the hottest Girl of the Week.

Choose the image you like best and vote by placing the letter A or B in your comments.

.

With Joan Wilson

Welcome to this brand new column from YardFlex...it's a chance to air off about any and everything that affects us.

Now, I begin with the biggest gripe of all...the way these gays are holding dancehall ransom. Now, fi real a doan blame dem. If dem is one ting and have dem money and people behind it (no pun intended) whey wi stan up fi whey dem believe in...den all means do.

Yuh know who a blame...de man dem whey love knock off fist and claim sey dem straight...and di one dem whey nuh stop spend dollaz pon woman fi prove dat dem a galis and den at the end of the day a doan si none a dem a campaign sey gay fi stop convert dem queen and left the young jocks dem alone.

Wha unno really a tell mi sey, di gays dem have more money and more people whey willing fi stand up fi a cause dan staraight people?

Why a doan si more dancehall lovers inna Jamaica and foreign a teck it do dem pon di streets, dem a campaign, unno can campaign tuh! Go out deh wid unno banners and sey no gays around here! No violence please, but meck unno voices heard sey unno nuh prepared fi stay one side and meck dem browbeat unno favourite artistes dem offa di stage.

But si yah, a dem alone have mouth. Yuh know wha, unno too laid back and a allow dem loud voice fi browbeat unno. It gawn bad when all Red Stripe a pull out from sponsoring Sumfest. Whey unno a guh wait fi happen next? Promoter stop book dancehall artiste and gi unno pure foreign culture? Nah, mi a lick out now, suh unno betta join fi mi voice and start fight fi unno owna culture...cause di nex' ting unno a guh know unno a guh have gay artistes, gay dis and gay dat...a suh mi sey!

By: Rootzgirl

I have a very important question to ask and I am not bashing anyone right now...but seriously why is it that Caribbean baby mothers are having a hard time getting support for their kids?

You were having a nice time with the man, he treats you fine ...everything is dandy and then the woman gets pregnant...but then for whatever reason – he messed up, you mess up...who knows...at the end of the day the relationship is over.

The sad thing is that the man forgot he broke up with you...and not the child in question and to add insult to injury he will only take care of the child if you are still in the mix.

One woman who was involved with a man from the Caribbean vented her frustrations to YardFlex, "Him teck di madda fat and a fry di pickney dem. Him damn well and know and understand the psychological part of it...sometime a feel so emotional imbalanced especially as is more dan one me have to look after."

On the flip side of the coin, some mothers are now ignoring their children and mistreating them just because the man is no longer around. It's even worse when the kids come out 'dead stamp' of the father, the ill treatment is multiplied then! But credit must be given to the strong sisters out there who in those cases become both the mother and the father for their kids – giving them a balanced environment, nurturing and bringing them up the best way they know how with the result being the children are even more balanced than those coming from two parents home.

At the end of the day, I just have to say that some of these fathers just need to be more conscientious about handling these situations. It doesn't matter if the relationship has gone sour, the responsibilities are still there. Spend quality time with your children and take good care of them. The same goes for the mothers, it's not about the man it's about that child you brought into the world, stop taking out your anger and frustration on an innocent victim.

By: Buffilous

Yeah man a mi Buffilous and dis time, mi mad, cross, angry and miserable, cause mi really, really tiad a di fool fool woman dem out deh who siddung inna situation and galang like sey dem love it. Although mi done come to di conclusion dat some woman just enjoy when dem man buss up dem face and tun dem inna a punching bag whey boxer use.

But den again, maybe dem tink sey a love di man a show...mi nuh really know cause mi have dis sicko friend a mine whey meck mi feel like mi waan gi har two lick just fi have sense. Cause she claim sey nuff time she pick argument wid har man just fi him get vex and lick out har backside and den when him done him gi har a proper fixing...damn! Den she so obsessed dat she doan trust him one inch. Di minute him tun him back and left him phone careless a she dat inna it a search through it. She look fi girl names and gawn inna di message outbox, fi si if him a send out any sexy message to any woman...and if she come cross anyting suspicious, she get vex and fling it a grung and dats the last of a good working phone...mi nuh have to tell unno what come after...yeah more lick him in har backside and den dem meck up again. Jeez!

But peeps, yuh know di sickest ting of all she claim sey sey she love when after him beat har, dem meck up and is a di best sex a har life she get! Lawks, a whey di world a come to man. It suh sweet dat all di nex' day she pick argument again and repeat di cycle. It get so bad, dat even if people hear him a kill har dem nah interfere cause dem know she enjoy it...somebody please help da woman yah!

Me kno a nuff unnuh out deh tan like har, so some a unnuh nuh badda gwan like seh a she alone tan so. All a di ooman dem weh love wen dem man beat dem and den mek up afta, mek it known.

Bwoy peeps mi did kinda caught up di odda day in a some tings, not even coulda get time fi scratch mi head much less siddung round computer, but di drama dem now stop come mi way. But a get a real sweet one and mi caan help but share it wid unno.

Mi know di man dem a guh like dis ya one yah, cause some a dem tiad a di woman dem whey just a lay wait dem pocket like dem gi dem anyting fi pudong in deh...yeah man unno know sey a true. Some woman come een like sey dem nuh plan fi guh out deh go look it fi dem self. Dem just waan siddung and meck plans fi di man dem pocket.

Serve deh one yah right whey mi a guh tell yuh bout...di rich man from upstate carry mi go out a one restaurant and whey yuh tink di ooman duh...she guh order US$385 worth a hors d'oeuvre, nyam it and siddung comfortable tink sey di man a guh pay fi it.

Mi sey she mussa want fi piss up herself when di man git up, kiss him teeth and sey, "not even my wife a nyam $385 wut a food and walk out lef har!"

Now mi sey pram pram fi deh man whey have sense. Him stuck har wid har owna bill...and guess wha mi nearly pop up when mi hear how she haffi a call har friend dem fi come and carry money gi har fi pay fi di food...and mi same one haffi end up guh...just true mi did waan fi teck shame outa har yeye.

Mi gi har di money and a good tongue lashing pon top a it...mi warn har sey she must stop meck plans fi di man dem pocket, cause when she a plan dem a plan tuh...and if any odda woman out deh whey tink dem can always outsmart di man dem...unno tink twice...turnabout is a damn backside.

Mi wi si unno nex' time

YardFlex would like to send belated earthday greetings to Sizzla and Worrel King. They both celebrated their earth strong yesterday. We wish them both all the best and hope that they will live to celebrate many more.